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I have this gay friend who is currently in a relationship with my gay boss.

3 months na sila but they havent done it yet. Though ang hitad kong fren e sabik na sabik na makatikim ng luto ni Venus.

It made me wonder if it is really possible to be in a relationship be it a girl-boy, girl-girl or boy-boy relationship to last without sex.

Pag nagtatanong ako and sige based on my experience din its possible for a girl and boy relationship to atleast last without em doing it kasi marami pa nmng pavirgin na girls sa mundo (i was once like them) and pagdating nmn sa gay relationships accdg to my gay friends (which btw super dami ko!) ndi daw for the first part of the relationship pagtumagal na din daw tumutumal na din ang rasyon at napapalitan na lang mga kurutan at hagikgikan.

Next month, first anniversary na nila and Im thinking of the best way para mastimulate ang dapat mastimulate.

Any suggestions guys?????

 

and so it goes – billy joel

In every heart there is a room
A sanctuary safe and strong
To heal the wounds from lovers past
Until a new one comes along

I spoke to you in cautious tones
You answered me with no pretense
And still I feel I said too much
My silence is my self defense

And every time I’ve held a rose
It seems I only felt the thorns
And so it goes, and so it goes
And so will you soon I suppose

But if my silence made you leave
Then that would be my worst mistake
So I will share this room with you
And you can have this heart to break

And this is why my eyes are closed
It’s just as well for all I’ve seen
And so it goes, and so it goes
And you’re the only one who knows

So I would choose to be with you
That’s if the choice were mine to make
But you can make decisions too
And you can have this heart to break

And so it goes, and so it goes
And you’re the only one who knows.

taba mo te!

Aside

i realized a very sad truth.

Ang taba taba ko na…

Im not even sure why it surprised me when in fact for the last few months people around me like my family. friends and even boytoys were telling me that im fat. I would always tell them na im not fat fat since my hita are not getting bigger nmn.

Then my 28th birthday came, I drank and ate my heart out for one week and to my dismay after coming out from my hibernation i didnt like the woman i saw staring at me inside the elevator. I was really shocked when i saw my arms my legs and specially my tummy bulging and to think that i was wearing my super cute top and bolero jacket.

Damn, bat ko hinayaan maging ganito!! Bat di ako nakinig sa mga tao sa paligid ko.. bakit ndi ako gumawa ng paraan noong 100lbs pa lang ako? Ngaun im almost 120lbs and nakakainis. Ndi na ksya mga pants, skirts and blouses ko. Pag sinusuot ko dresses ko ndi na maganda tignan, pagnakasleeveless ako ang sagwa kelangan pang me dala kang atsara bago ko matitigan sarili ko sa mirror.

I decided to challenge myself, na papayatin sarili ko for the next 200 days.

Keep u updated!!!

 

Bet kong magdirek…

OH well! Ilang linggo na akong binabagabag ng aking so called “creative side”. Parang muing nabubuhay na paunti unti ang tulog kong kamalayan.

Ive been watching documentaries for the last few days and I dont know since im feeling this void inside. Me gustong sumigaw na if only umayos ako at inayos ko buhay ko maybe i could be writing something more substantial than me being a freak and me losing control of my life.

If nababasa to ni “Inno” i would surely get a scolding kasi he would tell me na its never too late na i can still try to be the writer that i wanted to be. Sasabihn nya, pwede ko kabogin si Kara David kaso sa sobrang arte ko baka daw instead of people admiring me because im brave and wa kebs kung pasukin man ng kaputikan ang pechayles ko e isipin pa nila na abangan ako sa Global City at pilitin akong mag report n lang para sa “the BUzz”.

Ewan ko ba?! Nakaklorkay! Im not sure if me kinalaman to sa darating na May 22 at tatanda n nmn ako.

Oh well! Happy Birthday to me…

Pag ang langit ang humatol!!!!

Ang saklap ng buhay ko ngaun.. after two months ng non stop na do do do over wit na akez dilig starting feb 11 till now. My heart got broken by a 22 year old kid and right now ang worklaloo ko nmn ang nanganganib¬†na ma lost in space dahil lang sa kabitchesahan ko sa isang nagtataray na indiano na itago natin sa name na “Ms. Ashraf”

Walang nangyayaring tama and to think na its my birthmonth huhuhu.. Asan na ba ang mga bertud na ipinagkalob sa kin ng reyna ng mga kabaklaan at bakit horror movie na me halong emote ang kwento ng buhay kong eto.

kamutin nyo nmn ako!

lahat na ata halos ng lalaking kinakikiligan ko ngaun e lahat PAYUMMY lang and shocks laway na laway nmn ako. Eto ata ang epek pag ilang buwan ka ng ndi na “uunclog” at panay porn and pangarap n lang ksama mo.

And gosh it doesnt help na me mga lalaking nagpaparamdam at ikaw nmng si sabik e naghihintay na yayain ka kumembular para matapos na ang tagtuyot sa buhay mo.

OO fine malandi ako at i can proudly say na im slutty but ndi ko kasi naging ugali na mag initiate ng isang mainit na tagpo.. Payummy din lang ako at waiting in vain ang drama ko but ngaun ngaun kelangan na talagang madiligan ng bongga dahil uber na feeling ko closed forever na ang petalyes ko..

Sana kasing ganda n lang ako ni Georgina Wilson para pati tulo ng pawis ko pinagnanasaan ng mga kaboyletan pwede din nmn Cristine Reyes atleast natalbugan ko si Anne Curtis.

Bottomline is… Kelangan ko ng “do”